I used to think that in order to be happy, you have to fulfill your childhood dreams, or live up to your younger self in some way. Over the years, I learned that this is complete BS for me. I’m quite sure that my 16 year-old self would think that 29 year-old Michael is kind of a boring dude. The things I like to do, that give me satisfaction and contentment now, are not what I wanted when I was younger. And I’ve struggled with these thoughts throughout my college years. In my mind, I’d give running a go, but as soon as I’m done, I’m going to go back to living the life I thought was cool in my teenage years. I became restless in my pursuits in running, because I felt like I was missing out on all these things I actually wanted to do. I felt like running was this thing I needed to “get over with”, so I could at least say I tried to discover my potential.

It wasn’t for much later, specifically during the covid-lockdown, that I realized I truly enjoy running and the process of becoming the best athlete I can be. I consider myself an open and social person, but I wasn’t struggling with the strict rules around parties and gatherings as much as other people did. I was quite happy prioritizing my training, having easy dinners with a few friends, or reading a book. Life was simple, and I liked it that way. Ever since, I’ve been very conscious about how I organize my life, to make sure that I actually keep my life simple in a world that encourages you to take on as much as you can.

It turns out that (at least for me), it’d be stupid to chase my childhood dreams. That kid was an idiot (as every kid should be). What did he know? It took some growth and self-confidence to reflect on my choices in life, and honestly ask myself: Is this what I want? When I stopped trying to be the guy I thought I’d be at 29, I had the energy to really go for the things I want now.